Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Let's Talk About Christmas Time

So!  Christmas is coming!  Christmas is coming!  And I know Christmas is coming because there’s a Christmas tree in the living room, and there’s colored lights all over the place and Auntie Em is using nutmeg and cinnamon a lot more than she usually does, and there’s peppermint sticks that Dorothy won’t let me have, and she’s put a red and green bow on my collar.  So that usually means it’s Christmas time, or I’m having a really vivid dream.

I remember the first time Dorothy told me about Santa Claus and what he does.  And of course my first instinct is, WHAT!?  NO WAY!  HE’S AN INTRUDER!  WHY ARE WE LEAVING OUT MILK AND COOKIES FOR A GUY WHO ENTERS OUR HOUSE VIA A CHIMNEY!

But then Dorothy promised me that Santa was actually a good person, and to prove it, he left me a few dog treats on Christmas morning.  So then Santa Claus became, like, my best friend ever.

Though there’s a part of me that does sigh at Christmas.  Because they put out some strange Christmas merchandise featuring Dorothy and friends, and sometimes me.  And quite frankly, I come out looking kinda weird on these things.

That doesn’t look a THING like my woman!  And I, I, I, well, I look like a grey CAT!

Hallmark Ornaments did an ornament on us back in 1994: - 

I don’t even look like I’m real you’re an ornament.  I know that!  But I look like a stuffed dog here.

And while I can understand why this is amusing on first glance, the fact of the matter is, it’s kinda CREEPY to put dead witch’s legs and feet on your mantleplace.

(and since this item has been discontinued, I have to imagine that a lot of people agree with me.)

But!  Should you wonder what you should be getting your dog for Christmas (Pssst!  Dorothy!  Pay attention here!)  Wonder no more.  It’s this…


Treat your dog!  It’s Christmas!  Buy your pup something fun and different for a change!

Happy Holidays, everyone!  :)